07 June 2012

On Still Waiting...

Well, I wish I had something to tell you, but I don't.

It's been two weeks exactly since I sent the letter. For the first week, I checked the letter box as per usual - every couple of days, or when it starts overflowing! - knowing that there would be nothing in there from her.

This week, I was checking just about every day, but not exactly, also knowing that while she should surely have received my letter, it would still be too early to receive one back.

But for the last couple of days, I've been checking it at least twice a day. Even knowing that it's highly unlikely for her to have written back on the exact day she received my letter. But I still can't help but feel a twinge of disappointment when my letterbox is empty. (Bills and junk mail most certainly don't count.)

I'm also regularly checking our email and answer phone because she could contact me that way too.

It's not all disappointment though. A little ray of sunshine landed in our box the other week, in the form of this gorgeous little birdy!

My wonderful friend Josella made me a new little friend and sent him with a beautifully written card and a prayer for peace to help the wait feel a bit more bearable. What a treasure that big envelope in my letter box was. Isn't she sweet?! I'm still trying to think of the perfect place to put my new birdy friend. He deserves somewhere special, don't you think?

So I continue to wait. Mostly patiently. Not always. It's a bit silly really. But not, at the same time.

* * *

I've had a lot of things going on to distract me from this waiting game I'm playing. Along with our normal weekly activities there's a birthday party to get ready for and a very good friend's fresh new baby (beautiful Eva!) to love on. My Mum's also been unwell - it's hard to explain, so I won't, but she's been having some ongoing health issues that came to quite a serious crisis point in the hospital over the long weekend. Mum's on the up now, although completely worn out and exhausted, feeling like she's "really been steamrollered by this." (Her words!) We are thankful for a wonderful, supportive family who have rallied around Mum and my step-dad, Paul, in great love, cooking dinner, sleeping over and dishing out medications and hugs in equal measure.

So I'm not lacking for things to keep me occupied! I'm also feeling a great desire to get my craftiness on, perhaps as a way to relieve some of the stress I've been feeling. In fact, I think I'll go do something now!

* * *

Next post in this series here.

Previous post in this series:
On Waiting...

Source for the envelope images here.


  1. Jess - I always imagined this part of the waiting would be the hardest and I guess the best thing to be thinking is that she is probably trying to distill a lifetime of her own thoughts towards you into an email, letter... phone call. All those words she has longed to say - written, deleted, re-written...Maybe she too has been checking her own letterbox twice a day since you were of an age to make this contact. Or maybe she is on a holiday un-aware of the wonderful letter that will greet her on her return. xx Here is a verse I am reminded of for you (I may have given it to you already - apologies if it is a repeat!)
    That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don't see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.

    26-28Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good. Romans 8 Message version - slightly out of context!! M xx sorry for the novel!

  2. I just found your blog through your link on Dianna stone's fb page. I so hope she will be open to contact from you!


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