19 June 2013

On Being In Touch...

Letter writing

Well, I am finally sitting down to write another post in my adoption series! What a long time it's been!

Would you like a quick recap? I was adopted at birth and last year began the process of tracking down my birth-mother (for privacy, I refer to her as B - for Birth-mother), and you followed along my journey as I sent off the first letter and received the first reply! It was incredible.

Well, since receiving B's first letter in August last year (wow, so long ago?), I have written back and she has written back again. Let me tell you, it is SO AWESOME to be in touch with her!!

At first it was just so surreal to finally be corresponding with this wonderful lady that had only ever been a concept in my head - to actually have a real person at the other end was so strange! Since exchanging a few letters back and forth it's been really nice. Wonderful to 'hear' her voice and get an idea of what she is like as a real person, and not the imaginary one that's always lived in my head.

We haven't met yet because B lives in a different country. So for now I have to be patient - if we had the money I would jump on an aeroplane tomorrow! I've said before how I'm so excited to meet her - and that was before we'd exchanged letters - and I'm looking forward to it even more now! In my head, the scene I see as we meet again is amazing. Can't wait for that looooooong hug that I know will come. Alas, unless we win Lotto (highly unlikely, as we don't buy tickets), that meeting won't be until the end of next year sometime. Patience, my pretty.

Norman Rockwell File:Johannes Vermeer - Lady Writing a Letter with Her Maid - WGA24696.jpg
source                                                                                 source

I'm in the process of writing my next letter to B - I started it about 2 weeks ago! I must finish it and send it off today, as I just got another letter from her in my letterbox this morning! Oopsie! I'm taking a bit to long to reply... It's been a busy few months: since I last wrote, we've found out we are expecting No. 4, Rosie started Montessori kindy, Elliot started school, we started renovating the house and Hayden had his accident - an eventful 6 months!

In the next few weeks (once my letter arrives at B's house) we will be setting up a phone call. Exciting and nerve-wracking - I get nervous talking on the phone!! But like she said in her letter today - one we start talking we'll probably never stop! I love it.

Also, interesting fact: today's letter included photos (YAY!!) and now I know who Tristan looks like! Amazing! He's always looked quite different to the others, a bit like me, not much like Hayden, but I see now lots like B! As I looked at the photo of her at 3.5 years old, I thought, "Tristan!" SO DARN COOL! Growing up, family resemblance was always something that I really missed: surrounded by a beautiful extended family who all shared the same genetics and family traits, no-one looked like me (or my sister). I have loved having my own family and seeing our children turn out to look like me and Hayden, and now I love love LOVE knowing that they also have resemblance to B.

So that's where I'm at! So happy to be in a good relationship with B; that my worst fear of being turned away by her never came true. In fact it was the opposite - she's glad I contacted her! It's wonderful to have been able to open up this side of myself that had, from necessity, remained a closed book. It's great to be able to fill out the blanks.

Check out the Adoption & Me tab at the top of my page (under the blog header) for the rest of the posts in this series.


  1. WOW JESS!!! THAT IS SOOOO COOL! I'm so stoked for you! How wonderful!! xxx

  2. Amazing Jess, im gobsmacked...you must be totally over the moon! Man, you must totally see God's hand working in that one !

  3. So glad it's going well for you guys. Hope you get a windfall to help with that trip.

  4. WOW Jess what an awesome blog, you really have a terrific way with words! It has been VERY special reading your blog and I feel immensely privileged. What a wonderful loving caring person you are, surrounded with a truly beautiful family. I couldn't be more pleased for you!!! Love from, wait for it.......B....yip..... THAT B! xx


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